A Former Leader's Journey: Silence Is Not Golden - It's My Time To Speak

A Former Leader's Journey: Silence Is Not Golden - It's My Time To Speak

"New Apostolic Reformation"

I Literally Can't Believe This.




I waited for 17 years to re-join a Pentacostal church, for a variety of reasons.
All that time i felt homesick for praying in the Spirit with others, and sharing about walking in the Spirit but because of geography and other factors, it made it very difficult, to get to another church. I loved to pray in the spirit privately and with a trusted few.


Going to church seemed such a struggle, again for a variety of reasons. Finally, i was able to go to a pentacostal church . Beautiful, vibrant people...I was so HUNGRY! I embraced these new people and they became my friends.



Then came a The School of the Supernatural. I found i wasn't worthy to pray for another because i smoked cigarrettes. I felt sad, but didn't feel terribly convicted, as Christ said, it is what comes out of a man's heart that makes him unclean. I have battled smoking on and off over the years, but i know that when i conquer that, i will still not be worthy, in my own power, to be redeemed. Only by his Grace. Only by his precious blood.

I felt a bit lost, a bit like someone on the outside looking in.. I thought i'd do some research..

Then i googled certain names and a certain movement, with so many other threads to it.. And i felt sick....

Then i saw an advertisement for one of these "apostles' books and i was aghast!

How can an 'apostle' who is writing a forword to his book state that the word of God "is a dull axe?"

I have friends who are there. I have tried to tell them and the leader that this stuff is not biblical. Some are angry. Some are silent. It feels so wierd, now i don't know how to talk with them. How can i go to their prayer meetings, (Which weren't in their church.) when we are not in agreement?I asked if anyone else in this church felt like i did.. silence was the stern reply. So no one else in this church has spoken against this stuff. No one else is moving.

I have returned to the traditional church I used to go to. Never have I been so grateful for the careful, methodical handling of the Word Of God. I have repented of spiritual pride, where i wanted to be where it was "happening,"where i wanted to learn something "new". Now i have to watch that i don't transfer that into a passion for being right, and take pride in that!

I also pray that I guard what I have been given and that I am never again tempted to go beyond what is written.

I keep praying that they will see. I have stopped doubting what i have discovered, which i tended to do at first. .. I felt locked out and i wanted the comfort of old friendships. I had to keep checking and checking and checking...

I am so blessed that the internet exists, I may never have known what i was about to dive into. I'm also glad for it because my new/old (!) minister had no idea about this stuff and he is now researching it all out too, after we talked. He is as shocked as i am. What a relief.